National Geographic thinks I’m a deadbeat

Last year, I decided not to renew my subscription to National Geographic: I returned their invoice with a handwritten annotation:

Cancel. And don’t send any slipcases.

Apparently, the subscription people aren’t talking to the slipcase people. The magazine stopped, but in mid-December the slipcases arrived right on schedule. I didn’t open it, and left it under my desk. I’ll deal with this later, I thought.

After a few months, the National Geographic people sent me a nastygram. I returned their invoice with another handwritten annotation:

I told you people not to send these slipcases. I await your instructions for their return.

Weeks passed. Another letter from National Geographic arrived, with a return label for the slipcases. I stuck it on the package, and dropped it off at the post office.

Shortly thereafter, another invoice from National Geographic. I ignored it.

Weeks passed, and I began to think I was done with National Geographic. Alas, no. In today’s mail, another invoice. This one was considerably less polite than before.

"Please call our customer service number this week," it said.

I don’t see much point in doing that. But I will say that whatever regrets I may have had over canceling my subscription have long since evaporated.